Issue link: https://read.dmtmag.com/i/220320
The Art of Manliness Continued JOBS for TEAMS little vignette in particular really stood out to me because it addressed my old nemesis: the gratitude journal. Psychologists have actually researched the effectiveness of gratitude journals and the results are mixed. For some people, they live up to the hype. Writing down what they're thankful for does indeed make them happier. But psychologists also found that for many people (like myself), gratitude journals have no effect on their happiness. Researchers blame the ineffectiveness of gratitude journals on the "pleasure paradox." Studies show we actually experience more and prolonged joy from an event when there's a bit of uncertainty and mystery associated with it. It's why randomly finding a measly $5 in a street gutter can make your week, but getting a long expected $1,000 raise might just cause a shoulder shrug. Because we've had a couple of months to think about and understand getting the raise, we've grown accustomed to the idea and so we don't get much of a rise out of it."The extraordinary becomes commonplace," as author Ian McEwan put it in his novel Enduring Love. And therein lies the paradox, according to Dr. Wilson:"People want to understand the good things in life so that they can experience them again, but by so doing they reduce the pleasure they get from these events." According to Dr. Wilson, this pleasure paradox sabotages the effectiveness of gratitude journals for some folks because "people typically spend a lot of time thinking about the good things that have happened to them, and thus by the time they sit down to write about these events they have already achieved an understanding of them and robbed them of some of their mystery." So my inability to feel happier from my gratitude journal(s) isn't because I'm a heartless Scrooge. I have become so adapted to having the things I'm grateful for that they no longer hold any uncertainty in my psyche, and according to research, uncertainty is the very thing that makes events and blessings in our lives more joyful and pleasurable. Okay. Now I understand why gratitude journals don't work, but is there anything I can do to feel more grateful for the things in my life, and as a consequence, a bit less cynical? Thankfully, yes.There's a simple trick to get around the pleasure paradox so you can feel happier and less discouraged about life, and more grateful for the people and things you have. Psychologists call it "The George Bailey Technique." A World Without George Bailey "You've been given a great gift, George: A chance to see what the world would be like without you." – Clarence Odbody, Angel Second Class Yeah, that George Bailey from the classic Christmas movie It's a Wonderful Life. George Bailey, if you recall, is a salt-of-theearth kind of guy who constantly has his dreams thwarted because he's always looking out for his friends and family. Ever since George was knee high to a grasshopper, he wanted to travel to exotic locales and build big things like skyscrapers and airstrips. Just when it seems he's about to get started on making his dreams come true, some crisis happens that causes him to put them on the back burner so he can take care of other people. Things come to a head one Christmas Eve when George's absent-minded uncle misplaces $8,000 of the Building and Loan's cash funds. Losing the money would mean bankruptcy for the Bailey Building and Loan and criminal charges | 18 JobsForTeams1213_manliness.indd 2 www.jobsforteams.com 11/4/13 9:33 AM