Issue link: https://read.dmtmag.com/i/267325
MARCH 2014 | BRAVAMAGAZINE.COM 37 WHY THEY LIVE LARGE "We never set out to have a family this large," Becky says. But after some trouble conceiving, the pair began looking at ˬDOPTION&VENTUˬLLYTHEYFOUND$ˬMEREN#RˬDYˬND+ˬXEN FROMTHE64'ROMTHERETHECOUPLEKEPTǠNDINGCHILDRENTHEY wanted to adopt. n*TWˬSVERYMUCHl8EWˬNTTHESESPECIǠCCHILDRENmo#ECKY says. "We went through the adoption processes for them be- cause we think they are each awesome, amazing kids." ,NOWINGTHEYWˬNTEDˬGIRLTHEYFOUND4OǠˬŀEN#ECKY went on a medical mission to Ghana where she fell in love with "LLY"+ˬND+ULIˬNˬWHOˬREBIOLOGICˬLLYRELˬTED ŀEIRLˬSTTWOCHILDREN5ESSˬND#OWENWEREˬDOPTEDˬTDIF- FERENTTIMESFROM$HINˬ+OETOOKTHELˬSTTRIPTO$HINˬTOBRING Bowen home, and the Ketarkuses even gained some sponsorship from Instagram to document the process in pictures. "DOPTINGNINECHILDRENCˬNBEˬHˬULǠNˬNCIˬLLYBUTTˬXBEN- EǠTSHˬVEHELPEDTHE,ETˬRKUSESWHOLIVEIN.ˬDISONBRING THEIRCHILDRENHOMEŀREEKIDSHˬVESPECIˬLNEEDSSOTHEYˬLSO received assistance to make those adoptions feasible. ŀROUGHSOCIˬLMEDIˬˬNDFUNDRˬISINGTHECOUPLEˬDVOCˬTESFOR CHILDRENˬLLOVERTHEWORLDWHONEEDTOǠNDˬFˬMILYBECˬUSE THEYKNOWǠRSTHˬNDˬBOUTTHEJOYITCˬNBRING#UTˬFTERPˬD- DINGTHEIRNESTWITHNINELITTLEONESTHEYmREǠNˬLLYREˬDYTOSˬY their own family is complete. n*mMVERYHˬPPYoSˬYS+OEWITHˬSMILE WHEN YOUR FAMILY IS MIXED "Having a transracial family opens our eyes in a million different ways," Becky says. Raising seven African-American children in a world that still struggles with racism has created issues not often covered in typical parenting how-to books. But they've learned to navigate the comments that come their WˬY#ECKYSˬYSWHENTHEYˬDOPTEDTHEIRǠRSTTWOBOYSSHEmD try to laugh when people made ignorant comments that bor- dered on racism. Or she ignored it. "I played it off as simple lack of exposure and education, and sometimes it was," she says. #UTEVENTUˬLLYTHEYLEˬRNEDTOSPEˬKUPˬBOUTIT+OEˬND Becky have honest conversations about race with anyone, but es- PECIˬLLYTHEIRCHILDRENŀEYmVETOLDTHEMTHˬTWHILETHISISNOTˬ colorblind society, not everything hinges on their race. "If you're white like me, these discussions [on race] are daunt- ing," Becky says. "But we have to talk about it." Becky says she's grateful about how far we've come as a na- TIONn"SRECENTLYˬSYEˬRSˬGO<+OE>ˬND*WOULDNmTHˬVE been allowed to have the family we do." Yet, she still wishes they wouldn't have to talk to their boys about how to act in order to appear "nonthreatening" to white people on the street. But, by DEˬLINGWITHTHESEISSUES+OEˬND#ECKYCONTINUETOHˬVEˬPLˬT- form to learn and advocate for their children. TURNING HEADS #ECKYˬND+OEˬGREETHˬTTHEREˬCTIONTOTHEIRLˬRGEDIVERSE family is generally positive. "We get a lot of people who try to count us in our van," 10-year-old Brady adds. In November 2013, Becky took eight kids to the airport to MEET+OEˬNDTHEIRNEWBROTHER#OWENJUSTˬRRIVINGFROM China. Holding up signs and banners to welcome Bowen, the Ketarkuses drew a crowd asking questions: "Who are you wait- ing for? What is the occasion? Are all these children yours? One MOREISCOMING ŀEYmVENEVERMETHIM Ζo ŀESUPPORTWˬSNICE Becky gets most annoyed at strangers who tell her children HOWLUCKYTHEYˬRETOHˬVEBEENˬDOPTED#ECKYˬND+OEBOTH SEEITTHEOTHERWˬYˬROUNDŀEYHˬVETHISQUOTEONTHEBˬCKOF their mudroom door as a daily reminder for the kids: "Outside this door is a world that will love to tell you how lucky you are. Some people may even use the word 'saved.' But in our hearts, we'll know that it's Dad and I who are the lucky ones and that it's YOU who saved US." FAMILY VACATIONS Aside from the international travel to bring children home, the biggest Ketarkus trips are their annual treks to Disney World. ŀEYmVEPˬCKEDUPTHEIRPˬSSENGERVˬNˬNDDRIVENPLUS hours south 13 times in the past 12 years. Becky says the drive to Disney is the only day of the year, other than Christmas, where the children are allowed unlimited use of electronics. To keep it affordable, they joined the Disney Vacation Club, they choose the least expensive resort, go the least expensive time of year and only eat meals they make (except a little ice cream, courtesy of Grandma). ŀE,ETˬRKI ˬSTHEYmREFONDLYREFERREDTOBYFRIENDS MOVE ˬROUND%ISNEYˬSˬUNIǠEDGROUPBUTSHEˬDMITSWITHˬLˬUGH n8EDIDLOSE+ˬXENONEYEˬRo /OHˬRMDONE+OEFOUNDHIM and he was too young to remember it.) Eleven-year-old Cameren says his favorite part is "just watching the little kids have fun." As they trade stories about the Tower of Terror, the Star Wars ride and meeting princesses, it's obvious that these trips are unforgettable for the whole family. BECKY (35), JOE (36), ALLY (11), CAMEREN (11), BRADY (10), AJ (9), JAXEN (7), JULIANA (7), SOFIA (5), BOWEN (3), TESS (3) KETARKUS